


Wonderland

by coldnuclear



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Alice in Wonderland References, Alternate Universe - Alice in Wonderland, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Friendship, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-01
Updated: 2015-11-05
Packaged: 2018-04-29 07:06:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5119517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coldnuclear/pseuds/coldnuclear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone thinks Erik is insane. Erik is the only one who sees talking rabbits and finds the insane ticking of clocks very bothersome and frightening. He also heard voices inviting him to tea parties. Erik knows they are real, or does he? </p><p> </p><p> But one night, all of this madness ends as he is finally taken away by a talking rabbit off to a place they call Wonderland, which is a rather fascinating and enchanting world- a place where he no longer has to deal with the harsh and cruel reality where he is perceived as insane. Everyone is mad here, this world is mad. He is accepted and loved here, but under another name, Alice. It is also in this world where he finds love in an enigmatic yet handsome mad hatter, who claims that Erik has always belonged to him. But every beautiful dream ultimately has an end, no matter how long it lasts. The clock is ticking.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Despite being in the midst of examinations, there was this idea for a story that really wouldn't leave my head so I decided to give it a shot. Feedback is extremely crucial because it may well be a bit weird- so please do comment! :> It'd mean a lot to me. I'll post more chapters when I'm finished with my examinations and if what I get back is positive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Despite being in the midst of examinations, there was this idea for a story that really wouldn't leave my head so I decided to give it a shot. Feedback is extremely crucial because it may well be a bit weird- so please do comment! :> It'd mean a lot to me. I'll post more chapters when I'm finished with my examinations and if what I get back is positive.

"Madam, I strongly believe that it is best for him to seek help from..somewhere more appropriate for him to receive treatment."

"Is he in that bad of a condition, doctor?" 

"No, not at all, madam. But he claims to be hearing voices, that is a bad enough sign. It is best if we start treating him early, lest it gets worse. And as I said before, this is not the right place. We do not have the facilities for such treatment." 

Erik hid behind the walls, listening in on the doctor's diagnosis of him to his mother; both of their quiet, careful voices seeping through the thin walls easily, trailing back to him. He shifted uneasily behind those walls, lips trembling as he fought against his own tears. He failed, because there came a steady stream of tears, staining his face and his clothes. He became soaked in his tears just like he was enveloped in his despair. 

The tired voices gradually faded into incomprehensible mutters as he slid away, back to the waiting room, longing to return back home so he could lock himself up in his room. As long as he could recall, he had been holding himself up in his room since he was seven. It was only in solitude that he found himself most comfortable, the most relaxed. He could do whatever he wanted and no one would be able to witness and judge him for that. Sometimes, he speaks to those voices. 

His father was yelling again as soon as Erik had slammed the door to his room shut after dinner. It was night. 

_Father doesn't want me, because he thinks I'm crazy. He yells at Mother at night, when he thinks I'm asleep. He believes I'm not his child, because I'm not what he expected._

 _I know how Father feels._

 _

But Father, you are wrong.

_

His mother's sobs haunt him every night, he always lies in bed picturing the scene, imagining his mother's pale, beautiful face contorted in pain because of his father's verbal abuse. But Erik could never help her, he knows she blames herself for Erik's state, and that makes him feel sick to the stomach. Because no one understands him, not even his very own mother. But Erik truly believes what he sees and hears. He'd never help the situation. He cannot even count the number of times he cried in his room, desperately trying to tune out his parents' angry, sad and desperate voices that stab each other, tearing open wound upon wound after each other. 

That is the problem. No one understands. 

No one bothers to listen to Erik, let alone even process what he tries to say. It's already difficult enough for him to put it into words. 

He knows everyone thinks he's insane. But he swears he is not. He does see rabbits -that can talk!- running about with clocks in their paws, and talking caterpillars too. He really does! But the strangest of all, he also sees this peculiar man with this huge hat, but not as often as the others. He sees that strange man very seldomly.

Yet Erik knows that his mother always tries, tries to lie her way through this, perhaps to somehow comfort him- or even her,Erik wasn't sure- that he was going through a phase and that he would one day get over his hallucinations. 

But Erik is no longer a child, he is 17. He already knows by now what is real, and what is not.

The voices still come to Erik, when he is in his room with the white-washed walls enclosed around him, shunning him away from the rest of the world. They come and Erik doesn't know what to do but just listen, and try to get them away. 

**Ah, my dear Alice, are you not attending my tea party again?**

 **We're waiting for you, my lady.**

 **

Time is running out!

**

Erik never understands any of those voices. 

"Leave me be!" Erik cries out in despair and hides himself under the covers. His racing heartbeat reverberating loudly in his ears as panic rises in him. "I'm not Alice! You have the wrong person!" 

**Well, aren't you a fierce one?**

 **Indeed, or perhaps we did get the wrong one.**

 **

No, I am certain he is the right one. 

Ah, but you said that the last time and that got us nowhere. Why should I believe- 

**

"Please, go!" Erik cries again, his voice trembling because he is so afraid. So far they never harmed him, but there is always a first time for everything. 

**Goodness, milady! I was in a middle of a speech!**

 **Jonas, I have reason to believe our Alice has changed a lot. He's so much more.. improper now that it displeases me.**

 **

Why yes, of course. I am disappointed. He has become an ill-bred child. But he is surely the one who opposes our Red Queen. 

Indeed, but it best be if we go. It doesn't do any good if we stay for very long, the Queen has said it herself. 

You are right. 

Farewell, Alice. 

We await your return.

**

Erik heaves a long sigh of relief. He grabs the nearest pillow for comfort and buries his face in it. The voices always come and go, their duration of their stay is never consistent. Sometimes they stay for long, sometimes they stay for just a short while. But it's always the same. 

They call him Alice, and treat him as if he were royalty. Or someone just very dear to them. They always beg him to 'visit' them, as if he could. There is always an invitation to some sort of tea party as well. But he is not Alice! He is Erik, Erik Durm. Alice is a name for a girl, not a boy. He is very sure they have gotten the wrong person. 

And the problem is. No one believes him. 

His stomach churns with nausea. 

Sometimes it gets very tiring for him. 

It really is. 

He tries to be okay, that he is human. He is normal, he really is! Except for those voices and rabbits and caterpillars and that man.. 

Sometimes he doubts himself too. Maybe he's really mad. 

And then he'll shake his head quickly. Why should he doubt himself when everyone else does. If no one is going to believe in him, only he can do it for himself. He has to be his own support. 

And deep down Erik knows that whatever he sees and hears is true. Because he does take a walk in the garden at times, and he sees shadows no one else sees. His mother and father confirm so. The bushes will rustle when he walks past, but doesn't brush against them. As if some animal has been hiding inside. There is also always some ticking of the clock. At first he thought it was a bomb and got very frightened. But then the ticking never stopped, and it thus leaves him very agitated. The ticking really bugs him, what is the clock counting down to? Sometimes, he sees the man hiding behind a tree. There's a huge hole there by it and it was there since nine years ago. No one took notice of it. 

Erik is scared. Terribly afraid even. 

_I am not Alice._ Is the last thought Erik has just before he slips into slumber out of sheer exhaustion.


	2. Chapter 2

It's 3AM. 

Erik was rudely awakened with a jolt, startled by the sudden realisation. 

_It's 3AM._

It's cold and Erik rubs his hands in attempts to warm them. Unbeknownst to him, his tears started trickling down his cheeks. Again. He sighs exasperatedly and rubs angrily at them, cursing himself under his breath as he sank back into the comfort of his covers. 

_What the hell is happening to me?_

He desperately tries to oppress the whirl of thoughts in his head, trying to keep it clear. Waking up so early in the morning is not an unfamiliar to Erik anymore. It's so common that it starts to scare him, because no one does this. This alone already alienates him from everyone around him. He shudders at the thought and forcefully shuts his eyes, willing himself to return to his slumber. 

Except he couldn't. 

"Someone, anyone.. please tell me I'm not mad." A whimper broke through and the walls of the dam broke, everything pouring out so forcefully as sobs wracked his fragile frame. He feels so lost. So _alone._

And then a sudden gust of cold wind rushed into the room, sending the boring, white drapes into a fury, struggling as they clung helplessly against the window panes. 

Erik's eyes shot open instantly and he gazes out the window. The sky is clear, not a single cloud in sight. But oddly, it seemed like a storm was approaching, Erik felt something stirring. _I'm not mad._ Erik repeated it once again, it really seems like something is about to happen. 

"Some say, to survive it, you need to be as mad as a hatter. Which unfortunately, that you are not." 

A deep voice cuts through the silence, followed by loud clatters of of teapots and cups crashed against each other. 

"Who's there?" Erik begins with a shaky voice. He really can't hide his nervousness. _Oh, I'm such a weakling._

Erik sits up in his bed and squints his eyes, searching for any visible movement. 

He finds nothing. 

"Are you yet another figment of my imagination?" Erik now croaks out, despair creeping into him once again at the mere realisation that this will be more proof of his insanity. 

Silence ensues again. 

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. 

The ticking comes again and Erik sits there, waiting in fear. His shoulders tense and breathing uneven. 

The ticking eventually fades as well as silence surrounds Erik once more. The silence is loud and Erik thinks he's going to get crazy. _But then I can't be more mad than I already am, right?_ He thinks miserably. 

"Milady, we are out of time!" A panicked voice shrieks, scaring Erik as he almost jumps from his place. 

"Show yourself!" Erik calls out, trembling. His heart is beating so fast he swears he will get a heart attack soon. _Any maybe that will be the best for me._

"Yet, he still haunts me phantomwise.." That voice. That low, gentle voice that caresses his ears yet haunts him. 

"If I were to die, I just want to see him before I do. Of course I highly doubt I will, but you know.. if it means I get to see him then I will gladly give up my life."

Erik holds his breath. His eyes dart around the room wildly, beads of perspiration forming on his skin. His hands cold and clammy with sweat. He grips the covers of his bed and fists into it. But the attempts to calm himself were in vain. 

Voices. They are all he hears. Erik chokes back another sob. 

Erik wants to cry for help. But it is caught dead in his throat. His mouth is open but no sound comes out. His voice is stuck, as if someone is holding it back, pushing his voice back into his throat. Trapping it.

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. 

_It's back again._

But the loud ticking of the clock is cut off abruptly as an anxious voice shouts. 

"We have run out of time!" 

And with that, Erik feels a strong, harsh -yet furry?- grip on his arm and he is forcefully dragged off the bed, onto the floor, heading somewhere. He struggles against the grip, but to no avail, helplessly watching as he is heading to.. 

_The balcony? Why?_ His arms gradually begin to burn and feel sore, his body does from the friction. He tries hard to blink back his tears. 

The moon slowly comes into view. He and the creature have now stopped at his balcony. This gives him the opportunity to take a good look at that person, _thing_.

What shocks him the most is that _it_ is so small, so harmless.

 _A.. bunny? With clothes?_

And then the bunny suddenly leaps and Erik's mouth opens in a silent scream as they are now in the air. He shuts his eyes, anticipating the impact when he falls onto the ground. Erik clasps his hands together in a silent prayer. 

But he never feels the impact of the fall. Instead, the next thing he knows, he's pushed into that giant hole he always sees that no one notices. 

_Another fall. Just great._

Erik reaches out to grab anything. This fall seems like it'll never end. His head pounds and his hands are ever shaking, he shuts his eyes again, furiously trying to wake himself up from this bad dream, this nightmare. His frantic heart beats irregularly with trepidation and he winces when he finally opens his eyes and looks down. He's plunging into darkness. 

\-- 

"Wake up, Erik. Wake up now!" 

Erik is never good with heights. He groans as he slowly gains back his consciousness. Nausea hits him like a tidal wave as soon as he sits up and he groans again. His stomach is churning and he wishes to go back to sleep, or whatever it was. It's a pain to be awake, to face reality. 

_Where am I?_

The room is filled with a dank, musty odour and it makes his nausea even worse. He takes time to gain control of his body and take in his surroundings. He's in a small room, with some doors. The room seemed a little run-down. Plaster was peeling, and the bricks seemed brittle. 

"Help!" Erik yelled as he rushed to a door, banging it and trying to open it. 

Locked. 

"Help!" Erik tries again at another door. 

Still locked. 

The cycle repeats until he tried all the doors. Panic is ever ready to seize him again, until he realises something. 

_That rabbit brought me here. He must be here too!_

"Rabbit? Rabbit, where are you?" His voice echoes in the room and he frowns. The rabbit is nowhere to be found. 

Silence. 

"Rabbit?" 

Erik is reminded of the silence that he encountered in his own room before. The silence is deafening. His hopes hit an all-time low and his heart fills with pure disappointment. 

A long surpressed sigh of anxiety escapes him as he sinks down onto the ground, having his back against one of the doors. 

_If this is a dream, then I won't have to worry right? A bunny can't drag me out of my bed and the house._

 _Of course not, Erik._

 _

You will wake up. 

Somehow. 

Any time now. 

_

**Clang!** The sound of teapots and cups again- 

Erik gasps as he raises his head up. In front of his is a round table. Had it been there before, or did he just not notice it then, having been too caught up in his fear and anxiety? On the table is what seems to be a potion, and a pill. There's a label on the potion. It reads "Drink me" and Erik rolled his eyes in dry amusement. 

_What else am I supposed to do with it, then?_

Erik picks the potion up to inspect it when a note fell to the ground as soon as he picked it up. His eyes naturally wanders down to the note. 

He almost drops the potion as he yelps in surprise, completely taken aback. 

The note, simply read: 

WELCOME BACK, ALICE.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to emphasise again like I did in my other work that feedback is encouraged and very much appreciated! It really makes me happy when you comment down what you think of the story, what you like or don't like. Anything. Thank you so much for the many kudos and those who have commented! The support is so heart-warming. :>

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback is always welcome!


End file.
